On the Ironies of Life, Michael Jackson, and A Bunch Of Other Things You Could Probably Live Without.

Reasons why I am blogging at 4:34 am:

1) I woke up at 4:00, completely, totally, and utterly awake. I'm going to be presumptuous and attribute this insomnia to the fact that I went to bed with the most excruciating of migraines/side effects/Lord only knows what type of pain at about 7:30 pm on Friday, and did not truly emerge from my bed until about 3:00 pm yesterday afternoon. What can truly be said about one's first migraine (if that is, indeed, what it is. Or was. Goodness, I can't be bothered with proper grammar right now!)? It's like being in labor. IN YOUR HEAD. It's like having mega-contractions in your head. The waves of mind-bending pain. The waves of nausea. The waves. Oh, the waves.

2) I've got the burps from the beans in the white chili I made last night. "Burps from The Beans." It should be a song! Or not. The white chili was fabulous, by the way. Thanks for asking!

3) I'm starving. Go figure. I haven't eaten much in the past 24 hours. Except for white chili, of course.

4) I was inspired to blog. And browse Etsy. At 4:34 in the morning, no less! I have found that Etsy does this to me. All of a sudden, BAM!! Inspiration hits on the home decor front, and because I have to be difficult, I rarely can find what I'm looking for in chain stores (although I must say I have had great luck with Target and IKEA in the past), so off I trundle to Etsy. When the Etsy siren calls, you answer. You must go to her, my friends. Don't be like me and start browsing at 4:34 am, but go to her. When the time is right, you must go. YOU. MUST. GO.

Have I convinced you yet?

Anyway, I'm supposed to be blogging about the ironies of life. Ah, yes. Life. It is truly ironic at times. Because certain things have been occurring in my life lately, I cannot help but reflect upon these said ironies, which of course has led to Alannis Morisette's song "Ironic" bopping through my mind as of late. Not that I am a fan of Ms. Morisette, because I'm actually not. I don't even own a single CD of hers. Steve does, but then again, Steve owns just about every CD there is to own known to man ON THE FACE OF THE ENTIRE PLANET. From Michael Jackson to Tesla (ew), he's got it. From "Classical Thunder" to the soundtrack from "The Wedding Singer", he's got it. Hey, if it wasn't for Steve, I would have no idea how revolutionary Michael Jackson was in the world of pop music. Really! Before I met Steve, I knew two (2) things about Michael Jackson:

1) My Grandma Jeanne was hopelessly in love with him.

2) My dad and his brothers (Uncle Mark and Uncle Brad) would inevitably tease her at every single family gathering about her undying devotion to Michael Jackson. WITHOUT FAIL.

And that was all I knew about Michael Jackson.

So when Steve came moonwalking into my life (HAHA- just kidding), I had no idea that I would discover that:

1) Michael Jackson was an insanely gifted child prodigy.

2) He developed a completely new sound in the world of pop music. A sound that, I am somewhat loathe to admit, find quite catchy. Hey, did you know that Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean" and David Bowie's "Let's Dance" were the top two songs in popularity during the year I was born? I'll bet you DIDN'T!! I realize I'm dating myself here, but A): I really don't care, and B) It just goes to show you that the music of Mr. Bowie and I were meant to be.

Anyway. Anyway. ANYWAY...

The music of Michael Jackson was also made slightly more palatable to me after viewing the music video of "Beat It". And even more so after viewing Weird Al's parody "Eat It". Steve found a brilliant video on YouTube which portrays the Michael Jackson version in the upper portion of the screen, and the Weird Al version in the lower portion. You will understand after watching the first 10 seconds why I find this so amusing. Oh, will you understand. I realize this rambling about Michael Jackson may result in my losing followers, but hey; you can't lose what you don't have, am I right?? So here we go. *Warning: This is my first attempt posting a YouTube video to my blog, and I have no idea how this is going to go. So, please be patient with me as I navigate the fearsome waters of the world wide web. Take some dramamine, if you must. Grab a life preserver. Hang on for dear life, and we'll get through this together.*

And that's all I really have to say about Michael Jackson.

Anyway, ironies. There's actually not a whole lot I can say right now about the current situation in my life, but this might help to sum things up:

I asked for England, and I got Union Grove.

I asked for Shaker Heights, and I got Kenosha.

I asked for Maine, and I got Wisconsin.

I asked for North Carolina, and I got Wisconsin.

I asked for the Pacific Northwest, and I'm getting...The Midwest.

I know; I know. Cryptic as all get out, but I will reveal things bit by bit as time goes on. To help ease the pain, here's my white chili recipe from last night (burps are optional):

White Chili- adapted from "Fix-It and Forget It".

1 chicken breast, cooked and cubed

2 cans of Great Northern Beans, drained

3 1/2 cups chicken broth

1 cup frozen corn kernels

1 small yellow bell pepper, chopped

1 small onion, chopped

1 4 oz. can diced green chilies (whatever level of hotness your palate desires!!)

1 tsp. ground cumin

1/2 tsp. dried oregano

1/2 tsp. salt

Combine all ingredients in a slow cooker; cook on low for 6-8 hours or on high for 3-4 hours. You can also combine all ingredients in a dutch oven/stockpot and simmer for an hour on medium. See below for incredibly marvelous toppings.

Toppings: crushed tortilla chips, sour cream, and shredded cheddar cheese. Some people like tomatoes for a topping on their white chili. I don't.

So there you have it. We've covered a lot of ground tonight, folks. A LOT. I am going to be adding a new category or two to this here blog, so stick with me as I revamp things around here. And now...off to conquer a rather small mountain of laundry.